It has been a long time since I've even considered writing something here.
Not that life wasn't eventful - because I ended up meeting and traveling with friends after a really long time. Life was good with the holidays, the break, the meeting people, the travel and the likes.
Not that I wasn't writing - because my life was filled with words - words for work, leisure, learning and then some work... :)
I admit that time was never in plenty but then there was never even an urge to write. Somehow, my mind was too busy running and chasing its own tail... too busy to think, to slow down, to sit down and search for some different words. Words others than stem cells, therapy, brain, neurons, mouse models and the likes.
But then, after a long time, I slept well and dreamed of finding words again. Words that were lost in my race against time to do more things than I can. Words that I had hidden behind or hidden from. Words that urged me to sit down, contemplate and think.
As I look back at the past few months, all I see is the frantic flapping to try and fit in as many things as I can into my 24 hour schedule, to do as much as I can, to learn as much as I can and suddenly, I see myself reduced to a list of projects and to-do lists. Sometimes, there is so much going on that I lose track of how much is done and how much needs to be done; how much I have gained and how much I have lost.
And then yesterday, I had to stop. I let myself be tired and over whelmed and let the day fly by me. After all, the running was only warping my perspective. It took a good book and a brilliant narration of it to somehow make me find my old self - the quiet self who would smile and cry with a narrative, who would only need a book and a coffee to lose herself. It took me a whole day to rise above the concerns of experiments, tickets, deadlines and bookings and to see life for what it was and what it can be - bigger than the sum of it all.
Every now and then, one must stop and do nothing - because it is then that the mind finds its own voice which is otherwise drowning in that bustle of activity, that never-ending anxiety and that frantic attempt at doing everything.
Not that life wasn't eventful - because I ended up meeting and traveling with friends after a really long time. Life was good with the holidays, the break, the meeting people, the travel and the likes.
Not that I wasn't writing - because my life was filled with words - words for work, leisure, learning and then some work... :)
I admit that time was never in plenty but then there was never even an urge to write. Somehow, my mind was too busy running and chasing its own tail... too busy to think, to slow down, to sit down and search for some different words. Words others than stem cells, therapy, brain, neurons, mouse models and the likes.
But then, after a long time, I slept well and dreamed of finding words again. Words that were lost in my race against time to do more things than I can. Words that I had hidden behind or hidden from. Words that urged me to sit down, contemplate and think.
As I look back at the past few months, all I see is the frantic flapping to try and fit in as many things as I can into my 24 hour schedule, to do as much as I can, to learn as much as I can and suddenly, I see myself reduced to a list of projects and to-do lists. Sometimes, there is so much going on that I lose track of how much is done and how much needs to be done; how much I have gained and how much I have lost.
And then yesterday, I had to stop. I let myself be tired and over whelmed and let the day fly by me. After all, the running was only warping my perspective. It took a good book and a brilliant narration of it to somehow make me find my old self - the quiet self who would smile and cry with a narrative, who would only need a book and a coffee to lose herself. It took me a whole day to rise above the concerns of experiments, tickets, deadlines and bookings and to see life for what it was and what it can be - bigger than the sum of it all.
Every now and then, one must stop and do nothing - because it is then that the mind finds its own voice which is otherwise drowning in that bustle of activity, that never-ending anxiety and that frantic attempt at doing everything.
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