Milestones are just ordinary days, steps or numbers ! But somehow in our heads, they mark a point in time and they offer us an opportunity to pause and reflect on the time that went by...
In my case, its been six months !
Six months from my big move to the US. It doesn't feel like half a year went by but strangely it does feel like I've grown in these six months (and not physically). Now that the dust of the move to the new place and the frantic pace of action has settled, its probably a good time to take stock of the new place and its people. Of things i love, of things i hate, of things i miss and of things i see.
Some of the things i noticed in my first few days still stand out in my head. I've grown used to some others and i am noticing a few as time is chugging along.
- One thing i really liked when i first came to the US were the friendly smiles and the casual banter that would be floating around in the air even when everyone is a stranger. This was quite unlike India in some ways where people are taught to be wary of strangers. There wouldn't be any greetings or smiles exchanged unless you knew someone beforehand. No hello's, good morning's, good day's or thank you's exchanged between passengers on the bus and the driver. Back home, people would rarely chat you up just like that. It took me a while to get used to it but i did like it.
But with time i see that there is also a studied indifference that lies underneath that veneer of friendliness. People tend to mind their own businesses and don't interfere in your own unless expressly asked. A bit of a change again because in India, even a small angry-sounding exchange would collect a crowd of people offering to help. Sometimes people would be all over you even when all you wanted was to be left alone. But now that I am here, i miss it sometimes. I miss the fact that seeing me sporting a lost expression on the streets in India would have prompted someone to come and inquire but here, no one really cares !
- The discipline on the roads is probably something i've truly seen here for the first time. It was such a surprise to see drivers wait for pedestrians and for other drivers to cross or change lanes. On Indian roads, driving was almost always accompanied by a sense of fear and ruthlessness. Fear that someone would emerge from the next intersection without a warning at high speeds or that someone would just turn/change lanes without an indication. And fear, that your car maybe the next victim of the many cases of road accidents that fill the newspaper's local news. Here however, people drive with the premise that the rules will be adhered to and back home, the premise was that there are no rules ! Driving was certainly an exercise for a sharp mind there, with the multitudes of cars, the drivers perennially in a rush and the many U-turns, intersections and one-ways that would leave you guessing if the road back home would be the same !!
- The re-cycle mania and eco-consciousness : in parallel with energy consumption !
I don't know if this is a trend all over US but certainly in CA, I see a lot of people talking about recycling. There are segregated waste bins, cans almost everywhere. Very commendable, right ? But with that, I also see and increased consumption of resources. Massive wastage of paper towels, tissues, napkins, printing papers, paper cups, plastic cutlery... the list goes on. Almost everything is disposable here - from containers for food to napkins and towels. And everything is used generously to maintain hygiene. Quite unlike India where costs would determine the products used and people would mostly use stainless steel cutlery, handkerchiefs, towels, napkins etc all of which can be washed and reused.
Power consumption is another drain. Labs and offices do not seem to switch of their computers, lights and air conditioning units. Unlike in India, where most people and establishments would try and cut infrastructure costs through a reduction in power consumption. And contrary to what one would expect seeing such a lifestyle, people talk of conservation, recycling, waste-segregation etc etc. Quite a wasteful exercise really from my viewpoint.
- And then the point of disabled-friendly society: This is actually a very serious subject and my citing it here would probably trivialize the magnitude of it but i love the way the roads, the buses, the offices, parking lots are all designed to help the physically challenged. No poor people unable to afford crutches or wheel chairs. No poor people relying on external help. I have seen many a disable person leading a life as close to normal as it possible can be with their dignity intact. There are ramps on road crossings and offices, securements in buses, elevators in offices, fully automated and motorized wheelchairs which enable people to do all their activities almost independently. It is incredible to event think of how far behind we are when it comes to certain social policies such as these.
- An endangered work-force: One of the first things one sees in the US is the dearth of manual labor. Most things which would be done with human involvement back home would be automated here. From car washes to fuel pumps, from parking slots to newspaper vending stalls, equipments are designed to minimize human involvement. Importance is given to ergonomics and labor efficient work. Use of trolleys, cranes, wheels, pulleys - almost anything and everything to facilitate work and to prevent physical damage to the people involved. This is quite unusual for someone from a developing country where labor is the only thing in vast surplus. Employers usually don't care about the security, comfort or health of the employee. As much work as could be, was humanly executed - from carrying bricks on head in dangerous construction sites to mowing lawns.... instrumentation was almost always kept at bay.
- The sense of security on the streets : This is something where I could be biased and wrong as my opinions are limited to this narrow stretch of CA where i live but from what i see, most men and women feel secure when they step out of the house. Unlike in India where women (and even men these days) sometimes feel threatened when they step out in the evenings especially if they are sporting a trendy look... here none of it seems to matter. Men or women are almost treated equally. I say 'almost' because there are always some people who recognize certain inherent differences and i honestly don't mind it. In my view men and women are different creatures but equal nonetheless. I was amazed when I first saw students, men and women, coming back at midnight and wee hours of morning without a fear in their mind.
- The "frozen" culture: This is something that almost anyone would immediately associate with an American way of life. The ubiquitous nature of pre-cooked, frozen/fast food. For the most part of my life in India, food was always freshly prepared. In fact, a lot of older people i knew used to eat food which was only cooked on the same day. Not even storing in the fridge worked for them! Here however, almost everything was available in processed, partially cooked form. It is definitely not a healthy way of living but it helps people who are struggling to keep pace with their lives. This also translated into altered definitions of cooking. While to an American, putting something into the microwave to heat/ re/fully-cook would also qualify as cooking, to an antediluvian like me, nothing is cooking till I start from the veggies and the spices and do almost all of it on my own.
- The GM crops... ??
Now this is one of the first things that would hit you if you compare the groceries, fruits and veggies in the US and back home in India. Somehow they are all much, much bigger here. And much better looking and shinier. In India, going vegetable shopping was usually a testament to your kitchen skills. Picking out the choicest tomatoes (ripe but not rotten), the choicest okra (tender and not firm) or the choicest grapes - it was all a skill. Everything involved constant picking and choosing. Unlike here where all the fruits and veggies are bigger than what i was ever used to and they are all of uniformly good quality. One never need to think about which one to pick. It will always be a uniform pool... And there is hardly a rotten apple in the basket.. :)
- The south-east Asian influence: Now this is somewhat of a global phenomenon but its presence is most felt in the US. Almost all the products you pick will have a Chinese or a Korean origin. From clothes and cosmetics to electricals and electronics, the Chinese have infiltrated every industry in the US. While one would notice a trend in India, one would still see an Indian brandname like a Philips or a Videocon branding the products even though the spare parts maybe manufactured in china. But here in the US, that charade of domestic manufacture is no longer an indulgence. The people too show a similar bias. The number of students of Chinese origin in the US far outnumbers that from any other country. I point this out only as an observation and not something based on concrete research but to my mind this seems like more of a trend than a sporadic local phenomenon.
- The desserts: For someone like me who has a wicked sweet tooth, India was a little challenging. The desserts I would like - the chocolatey, fudge and ice cream based bitter-sweet combos would all be the non-local forms there and would therefore be more expensive and difficult to get. Here of course, tarts, pies, cakes, cookies are abundant and omnipresent. It is almost impossible to resist them but I am indulging right now in the hope that eventually boredom would set in. I sure hope that the hope is justified because otherwise, atherosclerosis and diabetes may not be far behind... ;)
- The drinking syndrome: US is probably symbolized the world over with Coke and Pepsi. And justifiably so. Aerated drinks seem to be the biggest component of an American diet. From mid meal breaks to meal accompaniments, aerated drinks form the beverage of choice. I, on the other hand, have never been particularly fond of carbonated drinks. So while everyone grabs a zero calorie coke or pepsi, i look for some water and that is almost always more difficult to get (especially if you don't want it chilled) ! And then being a teetotaler, when everyone raises a toast with Champagne, i desperately hunt for that glass of sprite to find something to raise a toast with. But one way or another, carbonated drinks are not leaving me anytime soon. Thank God Tropicana survived along with Coke and Pepsi !
- The "coffee"less coffee - This is another common change that many Indians struggle with upon their arrival in the US. Having spent a good many years in the south of India, I was habituated to a steaming (or rather boiling) hot cup of strong, filter coffee, with a fair amount of milk. Coffee here of course is quite a different monster. The locals seem to like it black and dilute with minimal sugar and it is almost cold as they spend almost an hour sipping on it. It took me almost a month to get used to the new coffee here and i still have it closer to the Indian way. In fact, I was almost de-addicted and even now i drink only one cup a day compared to the three or four that used to keep my system running till not long ago !!
- The changing concepts of vegetarianism - Now this is an area that constantly surprises me. The reason is that all my life in India, there were not many definitions of vegetarianism i encountered. There was one breed which included eggs in their diet (people like me) and one which didn't. But there were not many other perumtations and combinations. But come to the US and people have even offered me shrimp because apparently seafood is vegetarian !!! Of course, thanks to the looks of a shrimp, i could avoid the taste but still, I had never imagined a possibility like that. And then well, you go to a chain like Mc Donald's and order a simple veggie burger and all that i got was a sliced bun with two tomato slices and a few leaves of lettuce ! All this after a lot of explaining to the lady at the counter that my brand of vegetarianism excludes all kind of meat - red, white or whatever color she could think of. It was an amusing exercise but i have learnt my lessons with time and with every experience i check items off my list... :)
- Finally the people and the place as a whole - I don't hate this new place and I certainly don't hate its people but I am still far away from being able to feel the pulse of this country. Far from having that sense of familiarity with a place which fosters comfort. I still feel like an alien, an outsider and an intruder. I also see that most people, including me here are constantly on the move. Not because they want to, but because sitting without doing anything is haunting and unnerving. I find almost everyone who is single in this place trying to keep their hands occupied so that their heads are distracted. This was not a sense that I lived with back home where there was a certain joy in not doing anything.
I still am trying to understand the people for what they are, for what they mean when they say and what they mean when they dont say. Because, although people are honest, there is a sense of diplomacy that cloaks that honesty. And while people may ask you how you are doing as a matter of courtesy, they dont really care about how you are doing. And while people may use the right courtesies, the right pardons and excuses, somewhere, all of it is just a gesture !
I don't know if this is my alien-ness talking or if this is a general observation, but one thing is for sure that while my first six months have been an eye-opener, i still have a long way to go.
And I sure am looking forward to the next edition of this post just to see where the changes have come about...
In my case, its been six months !
Six months from my big move to the US. It doesn't feel like half a year went by but strangely it does feel like I've grown in these six months (and not physically). Now that the dust of the move to the new place and the frantic pace of action has settled, its probably a good time to take stock of the new place and its people. Of things i love, of things i hate, of things i miss and of things i see.
Some of the things i noticed in my first few days still stand out in my head. I've grown used to some others and i am noticing a few as time is chugging along.
- One thing i really liked when i first came to the US were the friendly smiles and the casual banter that would be floating around in the air even when everyone is a stranger. This was quite unlike India in some ways where people are taught to be wary of strangers. There wouldn't be any greetings or smiles exchanged unless you knew someone beforehand. No hello's, good morning's, good day's or thank you's exchanged between passengers on the bus and the driver. Back home, people would rarely chat you up just like that. It took me a while to get used to it but i did like it.
But with time i see that there is also a studied indifference that lies underneath that veneer of friendliness. People tend to mind their own businesses and don't interfere in your own unless expressly asked. A bit of a change again because in India, even a small angry-sounding exchange would collect a crowd of people offering to help. Sometimes people would be all over you even when all you wanted was to be left alone. But now that I am here, i miss it sometimes. I miss the fact that seeing me sporting a lost expression on the streets in India would have prompted someone to come and inquire but here, no one really cares !
- The discipline on the roads is probably something i've truly seen here for the first time. It was such a surprise to see drivers wait for pedestrians and for other drivers to cross or change lanes. On Indian roads, driving was almost always accompanied by a sense of fear and ruthlessness. Fear that someone would emerge from the next intersection without a warning at high speeds or that someone would just turn/change lanes without an indication. And fear, that your car maybe the next victim of the many cases of road accidents that fill the newspaper's local news. Here however, people drive with the premise that the rules will be adhered to and back home, the premise was that there are no rules ! Driving was certainly an exercise for a sharp mind there, with the multitudes of cars, the drivers perennially in a rush and the many U-turns, intersections and one-ways that would leave you guessing if the road back home would be the same !!
- The re-cycle mania and eco-consciousness : in parallel with energy consumption !
I don't know if this is a trend all over US but certainly in CA, I see a lot of people talking about recycling. There are segregated waste bins, cans almost everywhere. Very commendable, right ? But with that, I also see and increased consumption of resources. Massive wastage of paper towels, tissues, napkins, printing papers, paper cups, plastic cutlery... the list goes on. Almost everything is disposable here - from containers for food to napkins and towels. And everything is used generously to maintain hygiene. Quite unlike India where costs would determine the products used and people would mostly use stainless steel cutlery, handkerchiefs, towels, napkins etc all of which can be washed and reused.
Power consumption is another drain. Labs and offices do not seem to switch of their computers, lights and air conditioning units. Unlike in India, where most people and establishments would try and cut infrastructure costs through a reduction in power consumption. And contrary to what one would expect seeing such a lifestyle, people talk of conservation, recycling, waste-segregation etc etc. Quite a wasteful exercise really from my viewpoint.
- And then the point of disabled-friendly society: This is actually a very serious subject and my citing it here would probably trivialize the magnitude of it but i love the way the roads, the buses, the offices, parking lots are all designed to help the physically challenged. No poor people unable to afford crutches or wheel chairs. No poor people relying on external help. I have seen many a disable person leading a life as close to normal as it possible can be with their dignity intact. There are ramps on road crossings and offices, securements in buses, elevators in offices, fully automated and motorized wheelchairs which enable people to do all their activities almost independently. It is incredible to event think of how far behind we are when it comes to certain social policies such as these.
- An endangered work-force: One of the first things one sees in the US is the dearth of manual labor. Most things which would be done with human involvement back home would be automated here. From car washes to fuel pumps, from parking slots to newspaper vending stalls, equipments are designed to minimize human involvement. Importance is given to ergonomics and labor efficient work. Use of trolleys, cranes, wheels, pulleys - almost anything and everything to facilitate work and to prevent physical damage to the people involved. This is quite unusual for someone from a developing country where labor is the only thing in vast surplus. Employers usually don't care about the security, comfort or health of the employee. As much work as could be, was humanly executed - from carrying bricks on head in dangerous construction sites to mowing lawns.... instrumentation was almost always kept at bay.
- The sense of security on the streets : This is something where I could be biased and wrong as my opinions are limited to this narrow stretch of CA where i live but from what i see, most men and women feel secure when they step out of the house. Unlike in India where women (and even men these days) sometimes feel threatened when they step out in the evenings especially if they are sporting a trendy look... here none of it seems to matter. Men or women are almost treated equally. I say 'almost' because there are always some people who recognize certain inherent differences and i honestly don't mind it. In my view men and women are different creatures but equal nonetheless. I was amazed when I first saw students, men and women, coming back at midnight and wee hours of morning without a fear in their mind.
- The "frozen" culture: This is something that almost anyone would immediately associate with an American way of life. The ubiquitous nature of pre-cooked, frozen/fast food. For the most part of my life in India, food was always freshly prepared. In fact, a lot of older people i knew used to eat food which was only cooked on the same day. Not even storing in the fridge worked for them! Here however, almost everything was available in processed, partially cooked form. It is definitely not a healthy way of living but it helps people who are struggling to keep pace with their lives. This also translated into altered definitions of cooking. While to an American, putting something into the microwave to heat/ re/fully-cook would also qualify as cooking, to an antediluvian like me, nothing is cooking till I start from the veggies and the spices and do almost all of it on my own.
- The GM crops... ??
Now this is one of the first things that would hit you if you compare the groceries, fruits and veggies in the US and back home in India. Somehow they are all much, much bigger here. And much better looking and shinier. In India, going vegetable shopping was usually a testament to your kitchen skills. Picking out the choicest tomatoes (ripe but not rotten), the choicest okra (tender and not firm) or the choicest grapes - it was all a skill. Everything involved constant picking and choosing. Unlike here where all the fruits and veggies are bigger than what i was ever used to and they are all of uniformly good quality. One never need to think about which one to pick. It will always be a uniform pool... And there is hardly a rotten apple in the basket.. :)
- The south-east Asian influence: Now this is somewhat of a global phenomenon but its presence is most felt in the US. Almost all the products you pick will have a Chinese or a Korean origin. From clothes and cosmetics to electricals and electronics, the Chinese have infiltrated every industry in the US. While one would notice a trend in India, one would still see an Indian brandname like a Philips or a Videocon branding the products even though the spare parts maybe manufactured in china. But here in the US, that charade of domestic manufacture is no longer an indulgence. The people too show a similar bias. The number of students of Chinese origin in the US far outnumbers that from any other country. I point this out only as an observation and not something based on concrete research but to my mind this seems like more of a trend than a sporadic local phenomenon.
- The desserts: For someone like me who has a wicked sweet tooth, India was a little challenging. The desserts I would like - the chocolatey, fudge and ice cream based bitter-sweet combos would all be the non-local forms there and would therefore be more expensive and difficult to get. Here of course, tarts, pies, cakes, cookies are abundant and omnipresent. It is almost impossible to resist them but I am indulging right now in the hope that eventually boredom would set in. I sure hope that the hope is justified because otherwise, atherosclerosis and diabetes may not be far behind... ;)
- The drinking syndrome: US is probably symbolized the world over with Coke and Pepsi. And justifiably so. Aerated drinks seem to be the biggest component of an American diet. From mid meal breaks to meal accompaniments, aerated drinks form the beverage of choice. I, on the other hand, have never been particularly fond of carbonated drinks. So while everyone grabs a zero calorie coke or pepsi, i look for some water and that is almost always more difficult to get (especially if you don't want it chilled) ! And then being a teetotaler, when everyone raises a toast with Champagne, i desperately hunt for that glass of sprite to find something to raise a toast with. But one way or another, carbonated drinks are not leaving me anytime soon. Thank God Tropicana survived along with Coke and Pepsi !
- The "coffee"less coffee - This is another common change that many Indians struggle with upon their arrival in the US. Having spent a good many years in the south of India, I was habituated to a steaming (or rather boiling) hot cup of strong, filter coffee, with a fair amount of milk. Coffee here of course is quite a different monster. The locals seem to like it black and dilute with minimal sugar and it is almost cold as they spend almost an hour sipping on it. It took me almost a month to get used to the new coffee here and i still have it closer to the Indian way. In fact, I was almost de-addicted and even now i drink only one cup a day compared to the three or four that used to keep my system running till not long ago !!
- The changing concepts of vegetarianism - Now this is an area that constantly surprises me. The reason is that all my life in India, there were not many definitions of vegetarianism i encountered. There was one breed which included eggs in their diet (people like me) and one which didn't. But there were not many other perumtations and combinations. But come to the US and people have even offered me shrimp because apparently seafood is vegetarian !!! Of course, thanks to the looks of a shrimp, i could avoid the taste but still, I had never imagined a possibility like that. And then well, you go to a chain like Mc Donald's and order a simple veggie burger and all that i got was a sliced bun with two tomato slices and a few leaves of lettuce ! All this after a lot of explaining to the lady at the counter that my brand of vegetarianism excludes all kind of meat - red, white or whatever color she could think of. It was an amusing exercise but i have learnt my lessons with time and with every experience i check items off my list... :)
- Finally the people and the place as a whole - I don't hate this new place and I certainly don't hate its people but I am still far away from being able to feel the pulse of this country. Far from having that sense of familiarity with a place which fosters comfort. I still feel like an alien, an outsider and an intruder. I also see that most people, including me here are constantly on the move. Not because they want to, but because sitting without doing anything is haunting and unnerving. I find almost everyone who is single in this place trying to keep their hands occupied so that their heads are distracted. This was not a sense that I lived with back home where there was a certain joy in not doing anything.
I still am trying to understand the people for what they are, for what they mean when they say and what they mean when they dont say. Because, although people are honest, there is a sense of diplomacy that cloaks that honesty. And while people may ask you how you are doing as a matter of courtesy, they dont really care about how you are doing. And while people may use the right courtesies, the right pardons and excuses, somewhere, all of it is just a gesture !
I don't know if this is my alien-ness talking or if this is a general observation, but one thing is for sure that while my first six months have been an eye-opener, i still have a long way to go.
And I sure am looking forward to the next edition of this post just to see where the changes have come about...
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