These are a few random thoughts which crowded my head for a long time... Things in my life and questions from others send me off on a questioning spree !! I had held back from posting them in the hope of more clarity but I haven't been able to sort them out and so i have finally decided to abandon my attempts at structuring them. I am out of "that" phase now but the thoughts are still relevant ... So, if the post seems a little random, lost and confused... just ignore it and take what you find...
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Someone once said - People come into our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime...
All our life we meet people, hordes of people... we however get close only to some...we form very few relationships in life... How do these people stay on ? Do we actively choose these few ? How do we pick out the few who stay with us ? What drives the relationships that we form in the course of our lifetime ? Is it need, greed or just happiness ? Are people calculating and scheming their way through life, counting their every gain and every loss before forming a relationship... ? Are people forming relationships of conveniences or bonds for a lifetime ?
How do we form our relationships ? Are we actively searching and forming them, picking and pruning them or are we passively waiting for the right ones to come along ? Are relationships formed actively or are they just the end product of many random occurrences... ?
I realized with the benefit of hindsight that I have never been proactive about relationships. I have never initiated most relationships, however, I screen my relationships. I may not have picked my relationships but I do filter the wrong ones out... I start off on an indifferent and yet open note with all people... and then slowly, they fall out of my view as I notice things which i don't like... Am I being judgmental ? I guess, I am ... but i think we all are ... what differs is how we deal with people after judging them ? Do we accept them as they are or do we try to change them ? Do we pretend to like them even if we don't or do we remain honest and take a stand ? Do we tolerate people or do we respect them for what they are ? Are our relationships based on fear and need instead of love and respect ?
Is it wrong to judge people... ?? Why is it ? There are different types of people and not everyone is what you would like... They are just different types, not better not worse...
You judge/evaluate people to find out whether you like them or not.. whether you can accept them or not ?
Of the many people i have met only a few have become a part of my life... some did not make the efforts, some did not make it through and i weeded some out.... The final circle that emerged is a group of people who i cherish for I accept them as they are and they accept me as I am... We are bound by choice not by relationships... by deeds not by words... They are my conscience keepers and they are my life...
I guess, our reason for a relationship is more important than the relationship itself... and that probably determines the fate of the bonds formed... I look around and i can see people lost in a maze, trying to find their way.... they are looking for support and they are looking for comfort. So am I. But there is a difference ! I am looking for comfort which comes from honesty not familiarity... I am looking for love which will last a lifetime because it is heartfelt and not because it is the means to an end... I am looking for support despite the differences because people can agree to disagree....
And so I wait for people to find me... and for relationships to happen...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Someone once said - People come into our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime...
All our life we meet people, hordes of people... we however get close only to some...we form very few relationships in life... How do these people stay on ? Do we actively choose these few ? How do we pick out the few who stay with us ? What drives the relationships that we form in the course of our lifetime ? Is it need, greed or just happiness ? Are people calculating and scheming their way through life, counting their every gain and every loss before forming a relationship... ? Are people forming relationships of conveniences or bonds for a lifetime ?
How do we form our relationships ? Are we actively searching and forming them, picking and pruning them or are we passively waiting for the right ones to come along ? Are relationships formed actively or are they just the end product of many random occurrences... ?
I realized with the benefit of hindsight that I have never been proactive about relationships. I have never initiated most relationships, however, I screen my relationships. I may not have picked my relationships but I do filter the wrong ones out... I start off on an indifferent and yet open note with all people... and then slowly, they fall out of my view as I notice things which i don't like... Am I being judgmental ? I guess, I am ... but i think we all are ... what differs is how we deal with people after judging them ? Do we accept them as they are or do we try to change them ? Do we pretend to like them even if we don't or do we remain honest and take a stand ? Do we tolerate people or do we respect them for what they are ? Are our relationships based on fear and need instead of love and respect ?
Is it wrong to judge people... ?? Why is it ? There are different types of people and not everyone is what you would like... They are just different types, not better not worse...
You judge/evaluate people to find out whether you like them or not.. whether you can accept them or not ?
Of the many people i have met only a few have become a part of my life... some did not make the efforts, some did not make it through and i weeded some out.... The final circle that emerged is a group of people who i cherish for I accept them as they are and they accept me as I am... We are bound by choice not by relationships... by deeds not by words... They are my conscience keepers and they are my life...
I guess, our reason for a relationship is more important than the relationship itself... and that probably determines the fate of the bonds formed... I look around and i can see people lost in a maze, trying to find their way.... they are looking for support and they are looking for comfort. So am I. But there is a difference ! I am looking for comfort which comes from honesty not familiarity... I am looking for love which will last a lifetime because it is heartfelt and not because it is the means to an end... I am looking for support despite the differences because people can agree to disagree....
And so I wait for people to find me... and for relationships to happen...
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