Waiting for the calm...

Solitude has been a long time friend of mine. For a long time now, I have been comfortable being alone. I have acclimatised well and have learnt to cherish the sound of silence. I have learnt to talk to my deeper self and I have accepted that it is better to be alone than with bad company (bad of course refers purely with respect to my taste in people and not in any absolute sense). I have indulged my creative spirits and have found new ways to challenge my mind. I have found ample company in my books and my thoughts. So much so, that over the years, solitude has become a necessity for me. I like my long walks and i have liked my silent conversations with myself. I was also lucky to find a set of friends who understood this need of mine and let me have my space. I like my moments of quiet and silence. Unlike others, i have come to need my space. Strangely, I find that this empty space completes me.

But now, despite my friendship with solitude, I encounter loneliness. Like a raging storm wave that catches the shore unawares, loneliness often manages to catch me unguarded. There are times when I ache to hear my people, to hear them talk and laugh, to listen to their stories and to laugh with them. I wish to talk to them about the daily mundane if only to crib and rant... But then even as these waves break on me, I stand still like the sea shore and wait for the waves to recede. I wait for the tide to pass and I wait for the winds to break. And then as the sun comes back again, I can feel the warmth of the world. But then, with every storm, I find myself a little different each time. A part of me is lost each time even as i find newer aspects of my being...

A little less and a little more - only to find myself anew...